Feeling Safe To Be Yourself

Everyone want to be loved and accepted!



It's hard enough growing, learning and making transitions in life, the last thing we need is others judging and picking us apart. People can be mean and not accepting, that can make being yourself pretty hard. People always say be yourself, but then they judge you for being yourself. I say no thank you to mixed signals! Sometimes we are also our biggest critics, we pick ourselves apart until we get to a low self-esteem.




                                                           
                                             AUTHENTIC SELF


Many of us have entertained the notion that if we change or conform people would accept us. I don't know about anyone else, but pretending to be someone else is exhausting. There is enough going on in life, who has time for keeping up an act. True happiness cannot truly be achieved when NOT living in one's truth and being authentic. 


                                              FEELING SAFE


Places and people matter!
Safety is an important factor in achieving self-worth. Often, we are trying to fit into places and with people who are not for us. Safe places is a space where we feel honored and encouraged to be our best self. People who are patient, compassionate, loving and empathetic help enhance our lives. There is no need to stress or pretend to be someone we are not. Although, we cannot live in a bubble away from the rest of the world, having the right support system will help us grow. Experiencing growth will help us handle the day to day stress of the world. There is safety and peace in being ourselves.


                                                               _ Cassie 

Surviving The Wait!

There is always an open door but timing is everything!
Waiting is the hardest part of any process. Especially, when we are talking about healing the wait can seem never ending. Being hopeful in time of crisis and despair is by far the hardest thing that I have ever experienced. Being hopeful in the time of crisis is not a piece of cake. When I was struggling, in some of my darkest times I felt like I was being consumed by my situation. The Isolation, loneliness and the sadness was so deafening I felt like I was drowning in my pain. Do you know what it is like to feel like this? Waiting is hard but I found helpful tools to help me survive the wait.



Digging Myself Out Of Despair

I knew that I could not continue to live like this, I need to make a change in my life.
I decided to take "baby steps" because after all I can't solve everything in one day.
The first thing that I worked on was my thinking, I wanted to replace my negative thoughts with positive ones. I had to be intentional in seeking positive thoughts, I did this by filtering positive messages into my mind. I used music, quotes and scriptures as a tool to change my thinking. This was not a quick fix it was years of reconditioning myself to think positively, repetition is definitely the key to success. This was the beginning of a new journey for me.


Joy For The Journey

Joy is a wonderful feeling that helps to lighten up the load on the journey.
It's hard to find joy in pain, but I found that it is better to wait in joy than to wait in pain. I know that everyday is not going to be a great day, and that is totally fine. I am not oblivious to the fact that some days will suck and I will feel sadness. However, I make the decision to pick myself up and not allow  the pain to take root. I feel like the moment that I start to feel sorry for myself is when despair will try to take root. I have no more room in my life for sadness and despair, therefore, when possible I try to wait in joy. I try to laugh more and smile more, sometimes I have to force myself to feel joy. If I have to watch a funny movie or a funny video then that's what I'll do. I try to remember I don't have to consume myself with the seriousness of life. I can take joy with me for the journey.


Cassie

Helping Others Help You To Heal!

I never would have thought in a million years that helping others would help me to heal. 

How could I help others when I feel so hurt and wounded?

This was the question I asked myself. I felt so unmotivated to get out of bed so how could I find the motivation to help others?

It was hard at first but I decided to give it a try. First of all it was not at all easy to make the first step toward this goal. The first step is always the hardest step, but I know that I had to make a change and try something different. I did not want to keep on the same path of feeling sorry for myself, because that was getting me no where. 

Baby Steps!                                          Baby Steps!                                         Baby Steps!

I researched to find out what type of volunteer work opportunities were in my community. I found out that there was a mobile means program in my community. I completed the registration online and committed myself to volunteering on Mondays. Registering online is one thing but actually going is a totally different thing. I was nervous about going and anxiety started to set in, this was definitely out of the box for me. I have been an extreme introvert all of my life so this was out of my comfort zone.  All I needed to do was take one more baby step out of my comfort zone. 

 One More Baby Step!                         
 One More Baby Step!         
 One More Baby Step! 

On the Monday of my first day I was nervous I just did not know what to expect. I pushed myself fighting my way through anxiety and fear. Finally, I arrived to my first day of volunteering with the mobile meals program in my community. I met the individuals in charge of the program and I also met other volunteers. I must say that they were very polite and very welcoming, I felt at ease and I was ready to help my community. My first day I helped in giving groceries to families that were in need. It was awesome to take part in helping  people in need, It made me feel good to help others. I did not have time to feel sad about my circumstances, because I was too busy feeling good about helping others. This was a healthy distraction for me and it was just what I needed. I found my niche, and it was then that I realized that helping others could help me to help. 

Since then I have helped others through different types of volunteer work in my community. I discovered that helping others is a "tool" to achieve healing in my own life. Volunteering has taught me a lot about being kind and having gratitude. Helping others have also help me to be more focused on the present and to be hopeful for the future. My circumstances may not be perfect but I am a work in progress. I am thankful for the present and I try not to dwell on past hurts. Helping others was a pathway to healing for me. 

Peace and Happiness Is The New Wealth!

I have been on this healing journey for a little while now 11 years to be exact.
I've learned a lot along the way, most of what I have learned is through some very tough circumstances. I still have more to heal and more to learn and I am embracing the process. As I mature and gain more wisdom from life lessons I start to see the things that really matter. When you grow up with very little material things like I have, it is easy to give into the thought that if I have more material things I will be happy. The truth is that material things are great and it have it's purpose. Having abundance does make it easier to move around and navigate through the world. However, I realized that it's always going to be something bigger and better and the quest for acquiring things will never end. No one wants to struggle to make ends meet and I am totally in agreement with striving higher for goals that will help me take better care of my family. When it comes to peace and happiness money cannot attain those things.


Peace and happiness is the new wealth. It cannot be captured in a bottle, it can only be felt in my heart. Happiness can be shown in my smile and my laughter. I can feel peace and happiness in the warmth of a hug from my loved ones. I can embody peace and happiness knowing that I am loved, valued and safe. I embody peace and happiness, from the love that I feel knowing that God loves me and he took the time to create me. Peace and happiness is truly the new wealth that I chase after, everything else is a added bonus!